The judge told him he went a little overboard.

While shopping at Winn Dixie last night, I found that with certain cashiers, things are slow to register.

Some people make big pottery items to urn a living.

A Daytona Beach girl entered a hair styling class, but failed and didn't make the braid.

Sleeping comes so naturally to me, I could do it with my eyes closed.

A friend of mine Tom, grew up with poker. He was raised, called, and dealt with.

I went to get my Jeep’s transmission adjusted, but the mechanic at the transmission shop seemed a little shifty.

A pyrotechnician should know how fireworks.

A friend of mine at the VFW tried to take a photograph without much focus until finally it clicked.

Old Florida Power & Light power plant workers never die, they just de-generate.

I tried to record an album in a reptile shop, but there was a terrible gecko.

A friend of mine got a job as a carriage driver in St. Augustine.

The first time he put the horse on the carriage, it went without a hitch.

I can Harley wait to get my new motorcycle.

Sailing, it's a sport that just doesn't float my boat.

What you can buy for a dollar these days is absolute noncents.

I came into my computer room this morning and leaned on the printer cartridge, because I wanted to tone up my abs.

I avoid funerals because I am not a mourning person.

The pianist led an upright life, but it wasn't grand. No matter how I tried to spinet, I couldn't console him!

A bacteria walked into a bar and the bartender said, 'We don't serve bacteria in this place.'

The bacteria said, 'But I work here, I'm staph.'

A Vilano Beach Truism: One person can keep a fishing line clear, but it takes two to tangle.

Here in Florida, there is a lot of Manuel labor for every Juan.

When I was young, I worked in a sweater factory. It's a very clothes-knit community.

Optometrists live long because they dilate.

I don't think I need a spine. It's holding me back.

Bakers earn the majority of their income in the morning, they earn most of their dough at yeast by a leaven o'clock.

We never got the tent up because of all the missed stakes we had.

If you are wearing a wrinkled shirt or skirt today, you won’t be surprised, that sales of irons are decreasing.

I saw a TV Channel 12 reporter at the St. Augustine Baskin-Robbins, getting the scoop.

My dog Peanut, failed her driving test. She can't parallel bark.

Substituting Saran Wrap is an Aluminum Foil.

When the air conditioning failed during the concert in Veterans Arena in Jacksonville, there was a fan protest.

Dissatisfied with the lack of thoroughness in the demolition of the old tavern, he got into the bulldozer himself and razed the bar to a new level.

Zookeepers spot clean their leopards.

My wife was very touched when she received the felt coat as a gift.

The young pine sapling was scolded by his father. Apparently he'd been knotty.

Pharmacists find their work to be very encapsulating.

A lady here in FloriDUH asked the dispatcher of a local trucking company, if they could ship an antique mirror to her sister in Toronto.

The dispatcher says, 'I don't know madam, I'd have to look into it first'.

Do hotel managers get board with their jobs?

I went out for a jog this morning and tripped over, I could have been wearing the wrong size shoes.

I haven't seen the footage yet.

Two astronauts who were dating put an end to it because they both needed their space.

Nylons give women a run for their money.

The ultimate liquid measure is the supreme quart.

Don't disturb anyone working on a puzzle or you may get some cross words.

You should never drink beyond the pint of no return.

I've been called a rare commodity. I wonder if that makes me silver or gold?

I guess I could be either ore.

Coins are mint to be.

The telemarketer asked me if I read magazines at all and I replied that I did, periodically.

Sparkey said old electricians never die, they just keep plugging away.

The St. Augustine City Orchestra ended every concert with a cello solo.

Everyone knows there's always room for cello.

I heard at the VFW meeting last night, that submarine commanders like to submerge themselves in their work.

I saw a show on DirecTV about women who are pregnant…who don’t know that they are pregnant!.

People have many misconceptions about pregnancy.

As I approached the Bridge of Lions yesterday in rush hour, my car radio played The Car Strangled Spanner.

My first job was working in an Orange Juice factory, but I got canned. Couldn't concentrate.

I once worked in the woods as a Lumberjack, but just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.

While looking at the World Book Encyclopedia on-line, I discovered that Shepherds are sheepish people who don't like staff meetings.

I tried being a Tailor, but wasn't suited for it -- mainly because it was a sew-sew job.